I'm so sorry to hear this... My thoughts go out to you and your family.

veecee wrote:

What movie is it?

Sorry, I never saw the question. The movie is an Irish film called Dead Bodies.

There is a lot of injustice when it comes to how people treat animals. It makes me so angry. It's nice that you care about this little cat. Cats are such strange creatures, you may never be able to catch her. But maybe try a little bit of food? YIt may take a little while but they tend to respond favorably to that.

NW16XE wrote:

I'm not saying change your plans; but feelings I can't get rid of are always, in my experience, the ones I really wish I'd listened to and not rationalized about.

I know. I agree.

Mattlocked wrote:

How long are you planning to go?

Ten days.

I don't really wanna go alone. Besides, he'd still go even without me. It's silly. I think I probably just need to grow up; no one is exactly as we wish them to be and I can't change anyone so...

Davina wrote:

Perhaps spend a bit of time doing the following:
1: what was it that originally meant the two of you disliked each other? Were there specific incidents? If so, what were they? Was it an equally mutual dislike?
2: what happened to change your relationship over the last year or so? Why have you been getting on ok now, when you didn't before?
3: how did it happen that you decided to go on the trip to Ireland with this particular guy? Did it just kind of evolve or was there a particular catalyst?
4: try and analyse what it is that doesn't feel right.
5: Has a similar thing happened before? Why are you a pessimist...is it because then you can avoid being too disappointed by things, when/if they go wrong?
6: is it absolutely necessary that he is the person you go to Ireland with? Are you worried things might go awry between you when you are there, even if nothing goes wrong beforehand? Although you really want to go to Ireland are you also a bit anxious about the trip? Have ground rules for the trip been drawn out?

All good points.

I'm not sure why we originally didn't get along. It started out that we did just fine, then some incident happened. Long story short, he's not the most caring and compassionate person. He's not mean he just...doesn't really care. If that makes sense. I have no idea why we get along now. I think because we started talking again and realized that we actually amuse one another. We have fun. His personality still irritates me so that could be part of what doesn't feel right. I don't trust him, and I've told him this. I know that I won't be unsafe with this person (he's not going to allow something to happen to me over there), so really it shouldn't matter as long as my expectations for anything besides a superficial friendship are low. We decided to go on a whim and really, I don't have any other single friends, so I either go with him or alone. I'm a pessimist about certain things because I don't want to be hurt or

Feeling a little bit deeper rant today so if no one wants to talk about it, that's fine. I just need to, you know, rant.

The Ireland trip I'm planning in March is with a male coworker. He and I, quite frankly, used to dislike each other pretty strongly. I mean, it was rough for a while. We've gotten along pretty well in the last year or so. We hang out once in a while and have a great time. We've both said that our basic personality is similar enough that we should never have had any problem getting along. Something just doesn't feel right. I don't want to drag this post out any longer because this is not a relationship or psych forum, but I'm just sooooo ... frustrated. I really want to go to Ireland. We enjoy hanging out so a vacation should, in theory, be no problem. But I feel that, in the next 5 months, something is going to give and not for the better. I already know that most people are going to tell me to listen to my gut. But I really wanna go! And...and... I can be kind of a pessimist about certain things, so maybe it's no big deal. Maybe?

Argh.

Those are nice and I actually haven't seen them before. I thought I'd pretty much seen all of the photos of him that the internet has to offer .

His birthday is October 21, correct?

Mattlocked wrote:

Wholocked wrote:

(For the record, I'm generally talking about native English speakers here - they should know better. Anyone who learns a second language is, as far as I'm concerned, welcome to speak in it however seems right to them. Kudos for being bilingual!)

Oh thank you. Soon I wouldn't have dared to post anything in English here anymore... 
"Teach" and "learn" - in German "lehren" and "lernen". Sometimes you can hear here (another tricky one  ): "Er hat mich das gelernt" (he learned me) instead of "gelehrt". Which sounds awful to me, but which, I admit, is a bit easier to mix then learn and teach. 

And a second one: mir and mich - in English both "me" if I'm not totally wrong. A quite common mistake here.

I agree with Wholocked. I have no issue with mistakes made by non-native speakers; I know what it's like to try to learn, speak, write, and think in another language--it's freaking exhausting! I used to work in a bank where 90% of my customers spoke only Spanish. I'd taken French in school, so I quickly had to learn how to communicate as I went along. I made a lot of mistakes and got teased a lot, but I was able to make myself understood. And the Spanish definitely comes in handy at the hospital now, so I'm glad I got thrown into the deep end, so to speak.

Anyway, I work with several Filipino nurses and, while all of them are fluent (you would have to be in order to pass the test to become a registered nurse in the States), they frequently mix pronouns. Eh...whatever, you know? I've read their charting, and their spelling and grammar tends to be far better than some of the native speakers I work with. Embarrassing, really.