My rant, not directed at anybody here.
And since I'm not sure what the rules are on swearing here, I'll refrain from entire words, but I'm sure it'll be fairly obvious.

Holy mother of f. Stop being so f-ing negative! It's driving me insane.
You're supposed to be a 'support group' and yet it seems you're just a bunch of bored housewives/husbands who sit around the house all day, whining and moaning and feeling sorry for yourself.

Boo hoo, my leg hurts, boo hoo, I can't walk, boo hoo, my life is so hard, boo hoo, my friends don't come to see me as much as they should, boo hoo, I can't sleep even though I don't try anything to actually help me, boo hoo, I have *another* infection, despite not being overly careful in the first place, or watching what you eat or making sure you're getting the correct vitamins and minerals for your immune system and to aid bone growth. Boo friggedty hoo! Harden the f up and stop whinging.

Does it even comprehend for you that maybe - just *maybe* - the power of your own mind is what is making your recovery process so damned hard in the first place? Don't tell me I don't know what it's like, I'm going through the same damned thing you are - I haven't been able to walk since February myself, and yet do you hear me whinging about how difficult my life is, or wallowing in a pit of self-pity?

NO.

In fact, I'm loving my life. I cherish every single day that I am alive and healthy.

I take care of myself in every way and shape possible and MOST IMPORTANTLY, I am goddamned positive about my own progression! And it's obviously working, since my healing time has surprised even my surgeon and I've yet to even receive the inclination of an infection. I haven't even had a single SNIFFLE in the past few months. I was doing so much better on my own than before I joined your so-called "support group" to "recognise the pain it brings us daily". I should have known from that description alone. Goddamn, f. Anyone would think you'd all just been told you've got a month to live. I know people with CANCER who have a more positive mind-set than you lot. I haven't seen a single positive thing on your entire site, besides what myself and Adrian* have posted, and HE left before I did! For the same reason! I left because I was sick of trying to help you all when you very clearly didn't want to be helped. "Support group", bah! Every time I mentioned something positive, you'd shoot it down and try to bring me down to your level of hopelessness. But no longer.

True support and strength is supposed to come from the INSIDE, but you're all just a bunch of weak-minded, pathetic, bored, excuse for people, sitting around and making excuses for yourselves. Forgetting the bigger picture and focusing only on the now. In a year's time, I'll be back into my dancing and daily gym sessions, and you'll still be locked away inside yourself, wondering why you haven't got any friends left and still relying on hourly medication, not even trying to help yourselves.

You disgust me.

/endrant

*Name changed.

My rant: I still think we could do with a chat function. That way, I could say hi to Matt and QE the same time, ask QE how her time away was, telling them I've been rewriting a lot today, thank Tobe for her comment on my fic and tell beasley how I've meant that comment at the other threat without getting lost in PMs!

Last edited by Schmiezi (June 13, 2013 5:58 pm)

I'm on facebook. Easy to find by my real name and a certain green door in the background. And yeees, it's a Start Trek dress I'm wearing. :-)

Need to make some small dinner now, but as hubby is still busy with his pc game I should be back in a few minutes! ;-)

... I'm silently cursing Apple for making sure that my 3G no longer supports Whatsapp! Okay, not THAT silently.

Russell, I didn't mean any offense, as I said - it definitely wasn't intended for anybody here. If you did take something positive from it though, you're welcome then, I guess?

This is going to get into another long rant, by the way, but then...we are in the ranting topic...

I was also diagnosed with a mild clinical depression from 14, and had a pretty negative view about everything for a long time. But I also managed to get through that without any medication. Well, I tried it once, but it just made things worse. The thing is that I didn't trust anybody, not even medication, for my own personal happiness - I have always believed that it should come from the inside and that it's not up to other people to keep you encouraged. And while I still have occasional downer moments for no apparent reason, I place a lot of value in the power of the mind. The things the human mind can do is absolutely mind-blowing. There have been a load of studies about it, all highly interesting.

On top of that, I'm half-Filipino and have travelled to the Philippines numerous times. Our family has always sent money over, and so while my family is doing a bit better than many others over there, every time I go over - it's still a massive culture shock. People who can barely afford to feed themselves, who are amazingly thankful for handmedowns, entire families who live in a 'house' (read: 'room') that's smaller than my own bedroom. They place importance on family and health and always focus on what they DO have, rather than the things they don't. And even with as little as they have, they're still always willing to share it with you. Then I come back home and people whine about every little thing and forget to be thankful for the fact that they're healthy and alive, with a roof over their heads, a flushing toilet and have hot water access, let alone have running water at all. And I get that many people just don't know any better because they don't have the same world experience, whether they've never travelled to second or third world countries before, or maybe just don't have it as part of their nationality, but they just...they forget that just being alive and healthy is one of the most beautiful things to be in the world.

AND THEN, I actually do have a couple of friends with cancer. One of them is currently in remission, thankfully, let's hope it stays that way. But the other way told 12 months ago that they would have 12 - 15 months to live. Instead of moping about, they've decided to "make the rest of their life, the best of their life" and are one of the most positive people I know. He's quick with a laugh and always has a smile on his face and is one of the most loyal, genuine people you'll ever meet, he hasn't let his condition get in the way of how he lives his life at all. In fact, he claims it's made him even more positive that life is there to be lived to the fullest - while it can be.

So all of that combined, then I join this "support group" so I could chat to other people who are going through the same thing I am, and I find that they're a sorry bunch of losers who do nothing but actually seem to live their lives by the same motto that's in their group description (seriously - I should have really known better from this alone), "to recognise the pain it brings us daily". They don't even try to help themselves! As soon as I found out what I'd be going through, I read every article I could on how to improve my health and immune system, how to promote bone growth, everything I could do to make sure I'd be able to get through everything the very best I could, and these people don't even try.

I'm inclined to agree with Davina - not so much that they seem to enjoy having a disability, but they seem to actively enjoy trying to get as much sympathy as possible from people about how 'difficult' their life is.

They just...oh f it.

I can't even.
I can't.



At least I left the group. I had to, for my own sake.
But I've been dying to let that all out since joining them.

Phew!

Tl;dr -

Don't be ungrateful. Appreciate life while you can.

The topic of everything that falls under the umbrella of 'mental health' is so broad that you obviously can't lump everyone in the same boat (although I'm sure the NHS tries it on.)

I had to see a therapist after a nasty little event in my life but it was more for guidance and technique rather than having someone to moan to for a couple of hours a week (to be honest talking about the event in question was just exhausting more than anything.) I can see why Sampy Arctica hated a support group situation because I feel that if you surround yourself with people of a negative mindset, like Mary Me says, they wear you down over time. (And I guess that could be partially down to whoever is leading the group not having a handle on it.) Sounds like your group have been taking lifestyle tips from Fight Club. Probably for the best that you ditched them.

Mary Me it sounds like your therapist was a little... um... useless I wish my exams had been like yours, mine were hellish... not to mention I had the same nervous reaction to exams as Rimmer from Red Dwarf I much prefered coursework/dissertations. You could take your time (or do what some people did; leave it until the night before and then go to work on a six pack of Red Bull and a packet of Pro Plus.)

Life is bitterly short and a sense of our own mortality drives everything we do. People just handle it very differently. Some people like the drama of it all and will band together with people of a similar ilk. It's just human nature (although in this case not a very healthy example.)

Poor Mary!

We are having a similar kind of problem. As we are a "Ganztagsschule", which means that there are lessons in the afternoon, we are not allowed to send everybody home before 1 o'clock. At 10 o'clock my class room had a temperature of 28 degree Celsius. There are no curtains on the inside (combustible) and no blinds on the outside (too expensive, I presume).

Heck, I was close to just go home myself.

Oh god I really feel for you Mary Me, Schmiezi and Davina xxx I really don't 'do' heat... being from the UK I can't stand anything hotter than cold drizzle. And stinging nettles are just oooh, nasty.

Not really a rant but a minor complaint. I have a casting to attend later today. I already know everyone turning up and yet I am *still* nervous... how... why?!  

(They're going to find out about my nerves and laugh at me I just know it )

Davina wrote:

Are nerves not normal? I think maybe a lot of others will be feeling nervous too because casting is competitive. Anyhow, I hope the casting went really well for you.

Thank you very much

As it turns out my nerves were not unfounded. I felt like I'd walked in on someone's board meeting... Full of suits (aside from the writer, the only guy I knew, who was more informal.) I think it went well but I'll know on Monday if I impressed or not.

Note to self though. When your audition is in a really tall building, don't climb the f**king stairs...

I think we need a rolling-eyes smiley on here...*sighs*

Great thread, though!