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    September 11, 2012 11:32 am  #1

    saturnR
    Mycroft's Contact

    Offline

    From: sydney
    Registered: September 3, 2012
    Posts: 528

    Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    I didn't write it. Just laughed my head off reading it:

    "Texts From Last Night" by p.r. fox:

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    5:44 PM

    We're out of milk.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    5:45 PM

    I'll pretend that was a polite request that I buy some.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    5:46 PM

    Good. Also, we need more poofarts.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    5:49 PM

    Er. Sorry?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    5:50 PM

    What?

    5:50 PM

    Oh. Poptarts* rather. AutoCorrect is unreliable.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    5:51 PM

    Never before have I wanted to say "lol" more than I want to right now.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    5:52 PM

    Grow up.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    5:53 PM

    Says the man well past the age of 22 who wants Poptarts.

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    10:21 PM

    It was the penis butter! That's what poisoned her! You're closest to her flat—go back there and see if the seal on the container has been broken!

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    10:26 PM

    I've hailed a cab and I'm headed for her flat. But I have to ask…what the hell is penis butter?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    10:27 PM

    For God's sake. Peanut butter*

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    10:28 PM

    Oh, well that makes much more sense. I'm still laughing at you.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    10:29 PM

    This is no laughing matter.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    10:30 PM

    Please, you like to giggle at crime scenes. You're just angry because you can't figure out how to type on your iPhone.

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    11:55 AM

    We will have to do dinner air sanitize time. We have a case.

    11:56 AM

    Another time* That one doesn't even make any sense.

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    3:01 PM

    Don't text me for a while. I'm expecting anal from Lestrade.

    3:01 PM

    Damn it.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    3:02 PM

    …are you now?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    3:03 PM

    I meant "a call" and you know it.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    3:04 PM

    Of course. So girlfriends really aren't your area.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    3:05 PM

    You're hilarious.

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    1:11 AM

    No, no, that's not right. He always has condoms. Come back to 221B, I need to think aloud at you.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    1:12 AM

    Let me guess. "Condoms" translates into "control"?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    1:13 AM

    Yes.

    1:14 AM

    And considering the fact that his DNA is shamelessly all over the crime scene, I think it's safe to assume he never has condoms.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    1:15 AM

    Look at you, making jokes about your iPhone incompetence. This is a good sign.

    1:16 AM

    Although you do realize you made a joke about a rapist?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    1:17 AM

    Not good?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    1:17 AM

    Bit not good.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    1:20 AM

    Sorry.

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    7:19 PM

    Come downstairs. I'm nor'easter.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    7:23 PM

    Okay. I give up. What was that supposed to be?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    7:24 PM

    "Bored". You might not want to come down after all. I may throw this godforsaken iPhone at you.

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    12:44 AM

    JOHN IF YOU ARE AWAKE I NEED YOU TO TAKE A LOOK AT THE NEW FETUS IN THE KITCHEN, IT IS CRUCIAL AND I'M ON THE OTHER SIDE OF LONDON.

    12:50 AM

    Wake up!

    12:54 AM

    Never mind. Case solved. The hound was the key.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    8:03 AM

    You're lucky I've learned to translate your bizarre AutoCorrect mishaps, Sherlock. Anyone else would have been alarmed to see that the first text of the day is you asking them to look at the new fetus in the kitchen.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    11:03 AM

    Don't be alarmed if Mycroft kidnaps you to some brand new palingenesis garage today when you get off work. He's eager to show off.

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    11:05 AM

    Parking garage?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    11:06 AM

    I don't understand how AutoCorrect would ever assume I meant "palingenesis".

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    11:07 AM

    You must say it a lot if it's getting so cocky about it.

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    JOHN WATSON
    4:31 PM

    Has he been out of the country recently?

    TXT MESSAGE FROM:
    SHERLOCK HOLMES
    4:31 PM

    If you had glanced at his watch then you'd know he was in Times Derriere when his wife was murdered.

    4:32 PM

    TIMES SQUARE* I AM FINISHED WITH THIS USELESS PHONE. WE ARE SWITCHING OUT TONIGHT.

     

    September 11, 2012 11:53 am  #2

    Harriet
    Most Human Human Being

    Offline

    From: 110A Piccadilly
    Registered: August 24, 2012
    Posts: 9,887

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    Nice and crazy 

    Eventually everyone will support Johnlock.   Independent OSAJ Affiliate

    ... but there may be some new players now. It’s okay. The East Wind takes us all in the end.
     

    September 11, 2012 11:55 am  #3

    Davina
    Moderator

    Offline

    From: The Only Way is Essex UK
    Registered: February 9, 2012
    Posts: 9,714

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    Really funny and having an I-pad I know exactly how he feels. It comes up with the most bizarre words sometimes.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Don't make people into heroes John. Heroes don't exist and if they did I wouldn't be one of them.
     

    September 11, 2012 2:55 pm  #4

    SusiGo
    The game is never over (moderator)

    Offline

    From: Germany
    Registered: June 5, 2012
    Posts: 22,965

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    ------------------------------
    "To fake the death of one sibling may be regarded as a misfortune; to fake the death of both looks like carelessness." Oscar Wilde about Mycroft Holmes

    "It is what it is says love." (Erich Fried)

    “Enjoy the journey of life and not just the endgame. I’m also a great believer in treating others as you would like to be treated.” (Benedict Cumberbatch)



     
     

    September 12, 2012 12:19 am  #5

    Sherli Bakerst
    British Government

    Offline

    From: Where my imagination takes me
    Registered: May 31, 2012
    Posts: 728

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    I enjoyed that!   

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.  -- Helen Keller
     

    September 12, 2012 12:26 am  #6

    Wholocked
    Moderator

    Offline

    From: Australia
    Registered: March 7, 2012
    Posts: 1,811

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    Bwahaha that was awesome.

    ETA: It would be good if you could post a link to the fan fic, rather than copy/pasting it. Funnily enough, those who spend time writing these things get a bit precious about their work being displayed without proper credit

    Last edited by Wholocked (September 12, 2012 12:27 am)

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    I dislike being outnumbered. It makes for too much stupid in the room

     

    September 16, 2012 12:01 am  #7

    sherlockedkt
    Adler's Whip

    Offline

    From: Alabama
    Registered: September 12, 2012
    Posts: 188

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    That was really hysterical.  I was snorting...

     

    September 16, 2012 2:23 am  #8

    NW16XE
    John's Army

    Offline

    From: USA
    Registered: September 2, 2012
    Posts: 366

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    I now want Poptarts....

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------
    What do 'real' people have, then, in their 'real' lives?

    So we go round the sun; if we went round the moon, or round and round the garden like a teddy bear, it wouldn't make any difference.

    The consolation of imaginary things is not imaginary consolation. -- Roger Scruton
     

    September 16, 2012 3:20 am  #9

    veecee
    Official Blogger

    Offline

    From: USA
    Registered: June 11, 2012
    Posts: 1,794

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    LOL
    My husband sent me a photo of something nice and was puzzled by my return text of "Poo!"
    (It was supposed to be "Ooh!")

     

    September 16, 2012 1:34 pm  #10

    Davina
    Moderator

    Offline

    From: The Only Way is Essex UK
    Registered: February 9, 2012
    Posts: 9,714

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    When I try and text 'just a mo' it always changes it to 'just a month'. Not quite the same thing really is it! It also continually tries to tell me my name is Sabina...b....y cheek!

    By the way has anyone else found themselves talking to phone/I-pad etc. along the lines of, 'No! Not .....whatever word it has decided should be there....I meant....whatever word you wanted to be there'? 'Stupid thing!'


    Last edited by Davina (September 16, 2012 1:36 pm)

    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Don't make people into heroes John. Heroes don't exist and if they did I wouldn't be one of them.
     

    September 16, 2012 2:20 pm  #11

    NW16XE
    John's Army

    Offline

    From: USA
    Registered: September 2, 2012
    Posts: 366

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    Davina wrote:

    When I try and text 'just a mo' it always changes it to 'just a month'. Not quite the same thing really is it! It also continually tries to tell me my name is Sabina...b....y cheek!

    By the way has anyone else found themselves talking to phone/I-pad etc. along the lines of, 'No! Not .....whatever word it has decided should be there....I meant....whatever word you wanted to be there'? 'Stupid thing!'


    Disable the spellcheck.  It makes life with iPad simpler. 

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------
    What do 'real' people have, then, in their 'real' lives?

    So we go round the sun; if we went round the moon, or round and round the garden like a teddy bear, it wouldn't make any difference.

    The consolation of imaginary things is not imaginary consolation. -- Roger Scruton
     

    August 20, 2013 11:25 pm  #12

    butterfly grl
    John's Army

    Offline

    From: at work most likely, in Texas
    Registered: May 16, 2013
    Posts: 300

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    I'm in the library, covering my mouth, trying desperately not to laugh loud enough to annoy those around me.

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Beware of dragons for you are crunchy and go well with ketchup

    Dr. Horribles sing along blog
    You people all have to learn
    This world is going to burn
    Burn
    (yeah, it’s two r’s. H, O, R, R, yeah right.)
    Burn
     
     

    August 21, 2013 4:25 am  #13

    Russell
    High Functioning Sociopath

    Offline

    From: Hello, Ohio!
    Registered: November 26, 2012
    Posts: 2,991

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    butterfly grl wrote:

    I'm in the library, covering my mouth, trying desperately not to laugh loud enough to annoy those around me.

     
    And I'm at my desk, giggling like crazy and thanking you for seeing/bumping this thread up again, as I didn't see it last fall when arrived!  Oh, all the good threads I probably missed because the archive was a tad daunting...    and oh my.... I wish it kept going!       Reminds me of one of my most favorite 'John's blog' entries, when the boys get into similar hilarious 'pings' with each other: http://www.johnwatsonblog.co.uk/blog/12march   
    I'm sure I'm not the only one who loves picturing the mundane/silly daily quips, or while reading, mentally pictured them typing from wherever they were, and automatically hearing the words in their own voices or the looks being given.     Also...  'fetus'?  Wha...??

    _________________________________________________________________________

    We solve crimes, I blog about it, and he forgets his pants.  I wouldn't hold out too much hope!

    Just this morning you were all tiny and small and made of clay!

    I'm working my way up the greasy pole.  It's… very greasy.  And…  pole-shaped.
     

    August 21, 2013 6:16 am  #14

    Mattlocked
    One More Miracle

    Offline

    From: Germany
    Registered: June 29, 2012
    Posts: 6,781

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    Oh, I didn't see this before.

    Yesterday I made a suggestion to my sister via WhatsApp.
    She answered "Oekonomisch" (economic).
    I was wondering what that was meant to be. She wanted to write "ok.". Simple. 

    My friend sent me a recipe, salad with "design and oil".
    It was ment to be "essig and oil" (vinegar).
    I told her I would love a design salad! 

    __________________________________

    "After all this time?" "Always."
    Good bye, Lord Rickman of the Alan
     

    August 21, 2013 6:44 am  #15

    Jonquille
    The Game Is On

    Offline

    From: France
    Registered: July 23, 2013
    Posts: 78

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    I'm discovering all of it as well, and the people around me are simply wondering why I've been giggling like a silly girl for the last 5 minutes !

    __________________________________
    Alone is what I have. Alone protects me.

      Not a fan.
     

    August 21, 2013 7:07 am  #16

    SolarSystem
    Threatened Knighthood

    Offline

    From: Germany
    Registered: July 30, 2013
    Posts: 10,650

    Re: Texting: Sherlock Vs Autocorrect

    Jonquille wrote:

    I'm discovering all of it as well, and the people around me are simply wondering why I've been giggling like a silly girl for the last 5 minutes !

    Same here. Should never read stuff like that while at work...

    ___________________________________________________
    "Am I the current King of England?

    "I see no shame in having an unhealthy obsession with something." - David Tennant
    "We did observe." - David Tennant in "Richard II"
     
     

     

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