BBC Sherlock Fan Forum - Serving Sherlockians since February 2012 » D'you think Sherlock has ever had a girlfriend?

The Doctor · October 6, 2012 11:42 am

Doyle once let Sherlock state (In Devil's Foot) '“I have never loved, Watson...'.

ancientsgate · October 6, 2012 4:08 pm

The Doctor wrote:
Doyle once let Sherlock state (In Devil's Foot) '“I have never loved, Watson...'.

Ah, but there's a first time for everything, so they say. Eh?

Mattlocked · October 6, 2012 4:10 pm

ancientsgate wrote:
The Doctor wrote:
Doyle once let Sherlock state (In Devil's Foot) '“I have never loved, Watson...'.
Ah, but there's a first time for everything, so they say. Eh?

lol
It's hopeless... *shakes head*

ancientsgate · October 6, 2012 4:32 pm

Mattlocked wrote:
ancientsgate wrote:
The Doctor wrote:
Doyle once let Sherlock state (In Devil's Foot) '“I have never loved, Watson...'.
Ah, but there's a first time for everything, so they say. Eh?
lol
It's hopeless... *shakes head*

I know. Don'tcha love it? heh

Mattlocked · October 6, 2012 4:57 pm

.

Last edited by Mattlocked (October 6, 2012 5:02 pm)

ancientsgate · October 6, 2012 5:15 pm

Mattlocked wrote:

.

Ah. There he is. *points* The man of the hour. *g*

besleybean · October 6, 2012 6:21 pm

Yes, but he's not a girl and he and Sherlock enjoy a loving friendship.

ancientsgate · October 6, 2012 9:55 pm

besleybean wrote:
Yes, but he's not a girl and he and Sherlock enjoy a loving friendship.

I'm not putting forth an argument for Johnlock here-- everyone can decide about that themselves, and I'm just stating what works for me inside my own little head For me, John is The Man. Yes. And Sherlock has no need for a girlfriend, which I think he already told us quite clearly in canon. *snerk*

besleybean · October 6, 2012 10:00 pm

I think John is The man, too. In the sense of him being the man of the moment, the action man, the perfect partner and friend for Sherlock.
I agree Sherlock has never had a realtionship.

Iwantthatcoat · October 26, 2012 5:52 am

Kazza- I agree with Sherlock being asexual ( I am also asexual/demisexual). But I also think that there is a distinct possibility that he is sapiosexual, and thinks everyone's an idiot!
This explains the interest in Irene. Not as "ooooh naked woman", but "wow! what a mind".
I say this as a confirmed John/Sherlock shipper. They are meant for each other in every other way. Just that pesky orientation thing. To me, it's further evidence of how sex gets in the way of perfectly good romantic relationships. Now, if Sherlock is sapiosexual or demisexual or asexual (and devoted to his partner,) that is surmountable. John, on the other hand, I'm not too sure of, but understanding straight male sexuality and how fluid it is is ... well... not my area.

Iwantthatcoat · October 26, 2012 5:58 am

Sherlock is, above all, practical. I think if being a virgin would hamper his work, he would not be a virgin anymore. I think he also likes to experience things first-hand, so I think it rather likely he would not be a virgin. If he needed to sleep with someone for information, I think he would, and being a virgin would hinder his work in this way. Sex? Yeah, I think he would be proficient. Relationships? No, definitely not. Waste of energy. Distraction.

besleybean · October 26, 2012 6:00 am

Thanks again, for another thoughtful contribution.
I agree with you, almost entirely.
I think John has already reached the stage of knowing how much he loves Sherlock...having just ' lost' him.
But yes. He's a straight male and biologically driven to seek sex for reproduction...so I do think we'll see him paired off with a female.
This will of course never stop him loving Sherlock and I for one will scream if we do not at least get a hug out of The reunion.

Sorry, we cross posted, so I've only just seen your 2nd comment.
Sometimes we have to bow to superior knowledge, then we are all different.
But also I take Mycroft at his word. He implies Sherlock is a virgin and I think he would know, nor see why he would lie about it.
I've said before, I would have to accept that Sherlock may have dabbled and he possibly would use sex ' as a weapon'. But I really cannot see this, it would seem to go completely against his character.
Plus of course, he does have a relationship with John.
I have no doubt Sherlock loves him.

Last edited by besleybean (October 26, 2012 6:06 am)

Iwantthatcoat · October 26, 2012 8:06 am

Yeah, I tend to defer to Mycroft as well, though being a virgin would be very impractical. Wondering if this could just be an " insult" he knows isn't true, or even a comment Sherlock could use to his tactical advantage as "proof" he is s virgin when he really isn't; but when I think about it more, I suspect he actuslly is a virgin.
But still hope he is asexual/demisexual, not merely celibate or lacking "opportunity". I would think he could create "opportunity" if he wanted to. He could play people and become whatever they wanted to bed them. With his disconnect between heart and mind I don't think he would have trouble doing this if he truly felt a sexual need/urge that wasn't a distraction. I guess what I'm getting at here is if he is a virgin it is not out of fear of sex or out of nobility or chastity.

ancientsgate · October 26, 2012 9:30 am

Iwantthatcoat wrote:
....
But still hope he is asexual/demisexual.....

What the heck is a demisexual? Keep the explanation short and untechnical please. Thx.

Iwantthatcoat · October 26, 2012 11:55 am

Basically: Someone who does not feel primary sexual attraction, but can react sexually (in response). Somewhere in between a traditional asexual and a fully sexual person. A Demisexual usually needs to be tuned into a relationship before they feel sexual connections. They wouldn't look at a random person and go "wow that person is hot, I want to sleep with him."

Last edited by Iwantthatcoat (October 26, 2012 11:58 am)

VivaCohen · October 27, 2012 3:20 am

Iwantthatcoat wrote:
Basically: Someone who does not feel primary sexual attraction, but can react sexually (in response). Somewhere in between a traditional asexual and a fully sexual person. A Demisexual usually needs to be tuned into a relationship before they feel sexual connections. They wouldn't look at a random person and go "wow that person is hot, I want to sleep with him."

.... I think I may be demisexual then.

Wholocked · October 27, 2012 3:54 am

VivaCohen wrote:
Iwantthatcoat wrote:
Basically: Someone who does not feel primary sexual attraction, but can react sexually (in response). Somewhere in between a traditional asexual and a fully sexual person. A Demisexual usually needs to be tuned into a relationship before they feel sexual connections. They wouldn't look at a random person and go "wow that person is hot, I want to sleep with him."
.... I think I may be demisexual then.

Hahaha Ditto

VivaCohen · October 27, 2012 4:11 am

Wholocked wrote:
VivaCohen wrote:
Iwantthatcoat wrote:
Basically: Someone who does not feel primary sexual attraction, but can react sexually (in response). Somewhere in between a traditional asexual and a fully sexual person. A Demisexual usually needs to be tuned into a relationship before they feel sexual connections. They wouldn't look at a random person and go "wow that person is hot, I want to sleep with him."
.... I think I may be demisexual then.
Hahaha Ditto

ha I just read up on it and I kind of assumed everyone was this way. Like, I look at people and I think "well, they are very attractive to me." but I've never lusted for someone unless I was in love with them. I always assumed when people say they're lusting for someone that they're taking the idea that the person is attractive and combining it with the fact that they have a libido. Like, they're making a decision that the person is lust-worthy. I always assumed when people talk about being attracted to someone they mean they just find them attractive. Do they actually feel a sexual pull toward them? lol I'm sorry... my mind is just blown. Do people actually lust for people they don't know without talking themselves into it?

Anyway... I think Sherlock is a virgin. I don't think he ever dabbled or experimented. My reasons are far less clever than everyone elses but I'm basing this on the fact that the writers wrote Mycroft and Moriarty explicitly stating that he was a virgin. If anyone were to know his sexual history, it would be those two (that sounded weird) but really, it's true. They're great writers, and great writers don't put extraneous writing into the work. So they apparently wanted the viewers to believe Sherlock was a virgin. That's my take on it

Iwantthatcoat · October 27, 2012 5:56 am

VivaCohen:
I am demisexual/asexual. And I went my whole life thinking what you said was true, but apparently it isn't exactly. People do feel lust for strangers. We are talking about /attraction/ here, not / behavior/. That is the key point. A "normal" person wanting to jump someone's bones doesn't mean they actually do it; but a demi doesn't feel the /urge/ to jump strange bones. I think it is similar to being sapiosexual (which is also a very real possibility for Sherlock). A sapiosexual sees intelligence as the most important factor and does not care much about other things ( including gender). Now as far as our dear Sherlock is concerned, I think it is very possible he is a sapiosexual who thinks everyone is an idiot.

Iwantthatcoat · October 27, 2012 6:01 am

I agree that Mycroft is never wrong. He can be deceitful, but never mistaken.
I can see Sherlock having a lot of sexual experience, but no relationship experience. I can also see him having neither. To me he is always about extremes.