As I couldn't find a better thread for this bit, I put it here:



http://superbbatch.tumblr.com/post/110887363053/oscar-contender-benedict-cumberbatch-opens-up-x

I think what he says here is important. 

Last edited by Vhanja (February 13, 2015 10:24 am)

It's important, definitely, and the way he's putting it is also very sweet.

Yes, I too am glad Ben said that.  It is important to get that message across. 

Just a note: In the subtitles one of frames shows him saying "True fans know they are treating on something, which is very dear and private to me".  What Ben actually said was "treading" - not that it makes the meaning of what he is saying any different, but it does make more sense when the proper word is used in the sentence.

Edited: because the last part of my post seemed better suited in another thread.

-Val

Last edited by Ah-chie (February 13, 2015 10:41 pm)

It is fine if you do not want to talk about it. And also if people who want to do this in a nice and respectful way. The only thing I really loathe are those spiteful blogs and conspiracy theorists. 

tonnaree wrote:

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only fan that doesn't want to talk about Sophie and the baby.

In a way, I don't either. I still feel this ridiculous pang of jealousy whenever I see a pic of the two of them together or I read/hear something he says about the baby. But I figure the only way to get over that is to just ignore it and relate to her and his baby in an adult way while inwardly stomping on my teenager-self who wants to close my eyes, stuff my fingers in my ears and pretend nothing like that exists. Therapy through exposure, if you will. 

(Not saying any of these apply to you or any other fan - that is just how it is to me).
 

Last edited by Vhanja (February 13, 2015 5:03 pm)

But talking about it on this thread isn't adding to any problems he might have, is it?

The problem comes when "fans" do overt intrusive things or say unkind, jealous, or mean-spirited things in the social media (like in blogs, twitter, etc.).  I don't see how saying congrats to both of them or wishing them the best (or even saying that they are sweet together) is hurtful or contributing to any sort of problem in any way.

Maybe I was a weird duck, but even when I was a teenager I never felt any bad feelings about a celebrity I liked getting married or having a relationship with anyone.  I was always happy if they were happy.  Their personal choices isn't something that affects me personally.   It was just an interesting sidelight that could make me smile hearing that they were in a happy place.  I don't understand it otherwise.

-Val

I feel any from of attention is adding to the media-induced problems Benedict might have. To an extent, he has some control over it. He knows when he takes on a role in a Star Trek movie, we will get more attention. He knows when he takes on the leading role in a Weinstein movie, he will get more attention. He knows when he takes on a leading role in a Marvel movie, he will get more attention. He knows when he does another season of Sherlock, he will get more attention. He might or might not like that attention, but I think he is smart enough to know that the choices he makes in his career have an impact on his private life. He can easily avoid that by going back to do theatre, low-profile TV-work and every now and then a role in an indie-movie and avoiding the big stuff. The press (and most of the fans) would move on soon enough. But he chooses to grab the opportunity that is presenting itself to him and makes the most of it (I am personally very glad that he does make the choices he makes, simply because it means I can enjoy watching his talent unfold more often).

Sophie, too, strikes me as smart enough to make her own choices as if she wants to be sucked into that crazy life Ben is living right now. Apparently she has decided that having Ben at her side is worth dealing with fans and photographers every now and than. So up to that point I would say: those are two seemingly intelligent adults and they know what they are getting themselves into.

The problem is that the kid won’t have that luxury, at least not for a few years to come. He or she will be totally dependent on the choices Ben and Sophie make; whether it is to share their joy with the world or to keep their family life private. Judging by their handling of things until now, I suspect that they will lean more towards the later. We as fans should respect any choice they make. The problem is that if there is a great interest in the fandom for Sophie or the kid, the press will provide. I have seen this in my younger years when I was still part of the Madonna fandom: there where whole websites dedicated not to her, but to her (back than) two kids, mostly consisting out of paparazzi photos and speculative newspaper articles. At some point she even addressed her distress about that in an interview. I know at least two sites (obviously by true, if not very thoughtful, fans who thought they were just being nice) went offline the very next day.

So I would say: congratulating Ben and Sophie on the engagement or the pregnancy, fine. Congratulating when the birth of the hopefully happy and healthy baby is announced by them, fine. Congratulating when they announce they have been married, fine. Being reduced to an oohing and aawwing mess when or if Ben and Sophie decide to release a photo of their child, fine. Refraining to comment on any of these news if one is still too grief-stricken about Ben being off the market, fine. But reacting, speculating, buying or clicking on anything private that does not stem from Ben and Sophie or being unkind about anything related to their private life, not fine.

But to be honest, what I have seen till now from Ben’s fandom, they seem (apart from the name maybe) very respectful towards Ben and quite self-regulating, so I’m not too worried. As long as everyone makes sure not to feed into any media-induced frenzy, it will all be fine.
 

Last edited by Lola Red (February 13, 2015 7:41 pm)

tonnaree + Harriet: third 

same for me!

To change the subject a little bit - I've seen it brought up in interviews every now and then whether Ben is posh or not.

Well, I found this pic that answers the question once and for all:



Ben watching tennis (French Open). 
In a Lacoste t-shirt.

I don't think you can get any posher than that even if you tried.

I know that in Britain, "post" might be seen as a negative word, but as a Norwegian, it's sure isn't one for me. His poshness is one of the things I adore about him.