BBC Sherlock Fan Forum - Serving Sherlockians since February 2012 » Free Rants

ancientsgate · October 30, 2013 3:57 pm

Schmiezi wrote:
... and in the end we adapt to it by going to the cinema earlier or later.

Or not at all.

Mary Me · November 1, 2013 1:23 am

I'm making this thread my new home now.
I hate where I live. I really do.
So I went to the cinema today with my best friend and it was a great fim, however, the good atmosphere was quickly spoiled as soon as we went to leave the cinema. My friend went inside a kiosk because she needed to buy cigarettes, which took her quite long and I just sat outside when a guy (foreigner, probably arabian) started to talk to me about the fake blood on my throat, which was all fine until six of his friends walked over, sat beside me and thought it a good idea (after a quick discussion whether I was pretty enough) to touch me in a rough way. That was when I stood up in shock "Excuse me" and just walked away only to meet my friend in front of the kiosk when she was just about to leave. I quickly explained the situation to her and so we were on our way to the bus stop, passing these guys when one of them would punch me hard in the stomach as we walked by and kick me in the leg.
I seriously don't know this guy. I've never seen his face before and I can't even remember it anymore.
At least it's only physical pain, which means that it will go away. I've been through much worse the past days. The rest of the evening I was just holding my stomach and wishing the guy dead. I wasn't sad, I was just angry how helpless I was. I don't really understand the world. I mean like, we weren't the only people there. There were even people from my school around. Okay, it was dark and nobody has the balls to stop guys like that but then I would at least expect that somebody would walk over to me and ask me if I was okay. No. I just live in a total anti-social area, that's pretty much about it. Gosh, I hate the world. You live in a constant danger, and if that evening was any educative then to remember this.

Last edited by Mary Me (November 1, 2013 1:32 am)

Russell · November 1, 2013 5:04 am

Oh for crying out…… I am so fed up with the 'I can do what I want/who cares if it's asinine' mentality….. so sorry to hear you were the brunt of that! *offers a hug*

John Harrison · November 1, 2013 8:50 am

that's just awful, Mary. are you okay? Shame on those guys. shame on the parents who raised them. shame on those who stood by and did nothing. There is really much better out there in the world. Glad to have found a small corner of it here. Take good care, cherish your friends. Hugs.

Mary Me · November 1, 2013 11:12 am

Oh god, you're all so nice. Thanks a bunch. I'm okay now, it's just a rather not so nice experience.

Mattlocked · November 1, 2013 11:26 am

Verdammte Sch-censored-e, Mary!!

I often wonder about the world, too. Even in our very small town you cannot go wherever or whenever you like.
A "grown up" couple around my age went by bike to some kind of festival on the marketplace. On their way back home around midnight (on the main road!!) two or three guys were standing in their way so they had to stop their bikes. The man was beaten half dead. His wife stood next to him, completely helpless. They took his mobile phone and his money and ran away. End of story.
I can understand that I better avoid certain places at certain times. But this!! What shall we do? Stay at home for the rest of our lives?
I can also understand that people are afraid to interfere, but not that they don't even come for help after the guys have left! Especially in a crowd everyone seems to think: There are others, so why me.

Last edited by Mattlocked (November 1, 2013 12:52 pm)

tonnaree · November 1, 2013 12:04 pm

What happened to you was so wrong Mary and I'm glad you are feeling better.
Sometimes I just can't wrap my head around the world. I often pray that karma is real because I got a long list.

((((hugs and stuff)))

ancientsgate · November 1, 2013 2:08 pm

Mary Me wrote:
So I went to the cinema today with my best friend and it was a great fim.... passing these guys when one of them would punch me hard in the stomach as we walked by and kick me in the leg.....

You didn't call the police? I would have. That's assault.

Schmiezi · November 1, 2013 2:13 pm

Oh Mary, I'm so sorry for you!

A friend of mine who was born in Morocco recently moved away from your part of town because he strongly disagrees with the behaviour of the other Muslims there. His wife was threatened on the street to wear a hijap, and he was told that he and his son had to come to the community meetings which are known to be very agressive and radical. He was also told what would happen if his wife would continue not to wear the hijap.

Hubby grew up in that part of town, too, and back then it had been a very good part of town. He can't believe how much it has changes over the last 4 decades.

Mary Me · November 1, 2013 4:20 pm

ancientsgate wrote:
Mary Me wrote:
So I went to the cinema today with my best friend and it was a great fim.... passing these guys when one of them would punch me hard in the stomach as we walked by and kick me in the leg.....
You didn't call the police? I would have. That's assault.

It took him like 4 seconds and then he walked away very fast, I hadn't really realized what just happened. If I find out his name then I will go to the police. In my city the police is very lazy and they would have arrived when the guys and all witnesses would have been long gone.
My conclusion is that these guys hate rejection. Do not reject them but make them reject you.
I'm also blaming my country a bit. People like this can move in whenever they feel like it and live at the state's expense. Citizens that do honest work have to pay for them only to get molested.
I'm really over it now, thank you all for the support.

Last edited by Mary Me (November 1, 2013 4:20 pm)

Russell · November 1, 2013 6:02 pm

Mary Me wrote:
I'm also blaming my country a bit.

*pat* Just wanted to say - Not just yours, though. Get irritated every time I hear another story from over here about the recipient of such an incident being swept aside, unable to get anything done about it, or heck, even questioned about their own part in it, and not the perpetrator. Not sure what the rest of your sentence had to do with it, as there's jerks of all types/status, but yeah…. eh, glad you were able to shake it off anyhow.

You know what thoughtfully startled me a while back? (and grumble… it really shouldn't have, if our priorities were better, like you said) - hearing an advocate for such stuff say something along the lines of how, sure, it's nice we have so many groups/advocates trying to help victims, but… why is that our focus, and not tackling harder the root cause - that people feel they can do that kind of crap to people in the first place (laws be darned)? *sighs and shrugs, going back to happy place with her show*

Titania · November 1, 2013 8:11 pm

Mary Me wrote:
ancientsgate wrote:
Mary Me wrote:
So I went to the cinema today with my best friend and it was a great fim.... passing these guys when one of them would punch me hard in the stomach as we walked by and kick me in the leg.....
You didn't call the police? I would have. That's assault.

It took him like 4 seconds and then he walked away very fast, I hadn't really realized what just happened. If I find out his name then I will go to the police. In my city the police is very lazy and they would have arrived when the guys and all witnesses would have been long gone.
My conclusion is that these guys hate rejection. Do not reject them but make them reject you.
I'm also blaming my country a bit. People like this can move in whenever they feel like it and live at the state's expense. Citizens that do honest work have to pay for them only to get molested.
I'm really over it now, thank you all for the support.

I'm really sorry for you: *send Mary chocolate and tea to make her feel better*
I hate when people think they can hurt others just for a word or a look as if they were better than the rest of us

ancientsgate · November 2, 2013 1:08 am

Crimes need to be reported, period. If someone lives in a free country with good laws in place, then the police need to be informed when a crime occurs. It's useless to tell ourselves that "they won't do anything anyway," or "there were no witnesses, so no one will ever find the perps," etc. IMO we should report the crime, and then let the police do or not do whatever they're going to do or not do. Then we'll know that at least we did what we could. I'm reminded of the often-quoted phrase: the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

besleybean · November 4, 2013 7:21 pm

Bravo.
Tho please be reassured it's not just you and beleieve me, other people have equally complicated lives!
Should we have a thread on this? I dunno.
But I am certain I am not the only one both admiring and rooting for you.
Take Care and hang in there.

QuiteExtraordinary · November 4, 2013 7:39 pm

Thank you.

besleybean · November 4, 2013 7:45 pm

Hugs.

Titania · November 4, 2013 8:20 pm

You are who you are...Normal is a word so restrictif and I hate it....*hugs* and I must say you're indeed quite extraordinary

Mattlocked · November 4, 2013 8:32 pm

Oh, I really love this forum and the people around!
What a mixture!
I just had to think back, about what we have been talking about here already and who we "met": People who are heterosexual, homosexual, asexual, transsexual. And several "strokes of fate". Crazy fangirls aged between 12 and 72. Or so.
Now tell me what is "normal". Some time in my life I decided that "normal" doesn't exist.
I admit that I have no idea what you are going through right now and how you must feel, but I don't fully understand why you put your explanation in the rant-thread. I hope it's not all bad right now, but.... let's call it.... exciting.

Speaking of your bit of internet research: I think the next days I will have to look up some terms from your explanation. Goooogle!!

Besley: What would the thread been called: "My complicated life"?

Last edited by Mattlocked (November 4, 2013 8:34 pm)

besleybean · November 4, 2013 8:38 pm

Yeah I dunno and not even sure if it's either needed or wanted...

Harriet · November 4, 2013 8:42 pm

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky-tacky,
Little boxes, little boxes,
Little boxes, all the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one
And they're all made out of ticky-tacky
And they all look just the same.
(Song: Malvina Reynolds)