MANY HAPPY RETURNS (TRANSCRIPT)

[Buddist Temple]

Blonde Woman: You bastard!

[Café with Anderson and Lestrade]

Lestrade: A breakaway sect of Buddhist Warrior Monks infiltrated by a blonde drug smuggler?  That never really happened.

Anderson: A blonde drug smuggler who was exposed by an abbot with unusual powers of observation and deduction!

Lestrade: A blonde woman hiding amongst bald monks?  That wouldn't exactly take Sherlock Holmes.

Anderson: Perhaps it did.

Lestrade: He's dead.  I'm sorry, I wish he wasn't, but he really is dead and gone.

Anderson: Well, how do you explain this?  Sighting number two: incident at New Delhi.

Lestrade: You haven't been titling these?

[New Delhi]

Inspector Prakesh: After that, it was simply a matter of tracking down the killer.  Which I did, by working out the depth to which the chocolate flake had sunk into the victim's ice cream cone. (laughs)

(later) My friend, will you not take any of the credit?  This was all down to you.

[Café]

Lestrade: Clever man, Inspector Prakesh.

Anderson: (scoffs) What police inspector could have made that deduction?

Lestrade: Well, thank you.

Anderson: You remember how Sherlock never took the credit when he solved all of your cases?

Lestrade: He didn't solve all of my cases.

Anderson: He's out there.  He's hiding.  But he can't stop himself from getting involved.  It's so obviously him, if you know how to spot the signs.

Lestrade: Klein brothers, the Towerhouse thing, the Kensington Ripper- solved all of those myself!

Anderson: Well, you got Towerhouse wrong.

Lestrade: No, I didn't.

Anderson: Yeah, you did.  Okay, sighting number three: the mysterious juror.

[Hamburg - subtitled]

[Café]

Anderson: It had to be him.  There's no one else it can be, do you not see?  

Lestrade: I see that you lost a good job fantasizing about a dead man coming back to life and I know why you want that to happen.  But it's never gonna.  Okay, I want to go and see an old friend.  You take care, okay?  I'll put a word in and see if they won't review your case.

Anderson: Just look at the map, though.  He's getting closer.  It's like he's coming back.

[John's Apartment]

John: Well, it's good to see you, Greg.

Lestrade: And you.

John: Have a seat.

Lestrade: So, how've you been?

John: Uh, yeah, good.  Yeah.  Much better.  Uh, so what's in the, um…

Lestrade: Oh, that, yeah.  That's um, that's some stuff from my office, some stuff of Sherlock's, actually, I probably should have thrown out, but I didn't know if…

John: No, fine, yeah.

Lestrade: There's-there's-there's something here, um...wasn't sure if I should've kept it in.  You remember the video message he made for your birthday?  Ugh, I had to practically threaten him.  This is the uncut version.  It's quite funny.

John: Oh, right, right.

Lestrade: Maybe I shouldn't have brought it.

Johh: Don't worry, it's okay.  I probably won't even watch it.

[DVD]

Sherlock: Was that supposed to happen?  The light going down? Yeah, okay.  Uhh, umm…so what do I, what do I, what do you want me to do at the end?  Shall I umm...smile and wink, I do that sometimes, I have no idea why.  People seem to like it, humanizes me or…

Lestrade: It's fine, whatever.

Sherlock: Why am I doing this again?

Lestrade: You're gonna miss the dinner.

Sherlock: Of course I'm gonna miss dinner, there'll be people.  How can John be having a birthday dinner?  All his friends hate him.  You only have to look at their faces.  I wrote an essay on suppressed hatred in close proximity based entirely on his friends.  On reflection, it probably wasn't a very good choice of gift.  What was my excuse again?

Lestrade: You said you had a thing.

Sherlock: Oh, right.  Yes, that's right, a thing.  

Lestrade: You might want to elaborate.

Sherlock: No, no, no...only lies have details.  Right, just, I need a moment to umm, figure out what I'm gonna do.

John: I can tell you what you can do.  You can stop being dead.

Sherlock: Okay.  Okay, I'm ready now.  Hello, John.  I'm sorry I'm not there at the moment, I'm very busy.  However, many happy returns.  Oh, and don't worry, I'm going to be with you again very soon.

[Café]

Anderson: He's coming back.  Heh…heh heh.

(Note: I checked this transcript against the official subtitles and made corrections)

Last edited by sj4iy (December 24, 2013 5:54 pm)

Mary Me wrote:

What can I say. Something completely different but very nice indeed! 
Does someone would like to write down all of Sherlock's lines... I didn't catch them all.

I don't know if you can watch it on iPlayer, but there you can activate subtitles.

Thanks so much, sj4iy! 

Mary Me wrote:

Thanks so much, sj4iy! 

Any time

Commonwealth wrote:

I think Moftiss did know there's no jury system in Germany but wrote it in anyways to get Sherlock in Germany.  Hence the explanation that the "jury was convened under highly unusual circumstances".

I also thought this.  I wonder if this is somehow related to our baddie this series?  We saw the story in the CAM newspaper (Charles Augustus Magnussen).

Last edited by sj4iy (December 24, 2013 5:29 pm)

Some idi... not so clever people on twitter already complaining about the BBC airing S3 spoilers.

???

How is an "official" Hartwood-produced/Beeb-aired mini episode a spoiler?

Wonder if they'll even watch the episodes? That's major spoilers! XD

kete wrote:

Did you spot the reference to ACD canon in the New Delhi case? The inspector figured it out by determining how deep the chocolate flake had sunk into the ice cream cone. It was just a throw away line in one of the stories and I don't even remember which one, but SH once solved a case by determining how far the parsley had sunken into the butter!

 
Nerd alert:
This is one of the untold cases so we never get specifics, but it is referred to in The Six Napoleons.

sj4iy wrote:

I also thought this.  I wonder if this is somehow related to our baddie this series?  We saw the story in the CAM newspaper (Charles Augustus Magnussen).

Good catch on the CAM newspaper.  I was thinking maybe the jury was a reference back to TRF. Reichenbach is Richard Brook in German and Moriarty was acquitted by a jury.  So maybe it's fitting that Sherlock is on a jury in Germany putting someone behind bars?  

On that note, Moriarty hired 3 gunmen for Sherlock's three friends.  Here we have 3 cases.  Perhaps he's putting away Moriarty's 3 gunmen?

Commonwealth wrote:

sj4iy wrote:

I also thought this.  I wonder if this is somehow related to our baddie this series?  We saw the story in the CAM newspaper (Charles Augustus Magnussen).

Good catch on the CAM newspaper.  I was thinking maybe the jury was a reference back to TRF. Reichenbach is Richard Brook in German and Moriarty was acquitted by a jury.  So maybe it's fitting that Sherlock is on a jury in Germany putting someone behind bars?  

On that note, Moriarty hired 3 gunmen for Sherlock's three friends.  Here we have 3 cases.  Perhaps he's putting away Moriarty's 3 gunmen?

 
I also wondered whether the cases have a connection to Moriarty or CAM or if Sherlock just solved them to being occupied  .