BBC Sherlock Fan Forum - Serving Sherlockians since February 2012 » I'm gonna start a role play!

Cumbercookie · November 10, 2013 2:53 pm

I'm bored, and came up with this:

June 16 - 8:00 pm

Did Clara call? I sent a message for her to get in touch with you. I think you need another friend and you like her you said. Also, if you see her it will ensure that your parasitic sister stays away from you. Yes, John, your heart is too loyal to allow your mouth to say it, but your sister is a scheming sociopath and not a high-functioning one either. I know of what I speak so please don't try to argue.

I did some research on Clara. She seems alright. Take her out to lunch or something, John. Somewhere public so I can see you. You are losing weight, about 3.72 pounds so far by my estimation, so I suggest Angelo's. If it makes you feel sad to go there, then another pasta place.

I don't want you to lose your beautiful form. I love the symmetry and balance of your body, your great strength (which I was made aware of on the occasion of you choking me) and your serenity (except when you are choking me). There is an economy of movement about you that fascinates me. No energy is wasted; you are as still and quiet as a cat before it springs to its kill. You are amazing, John. But you need to eat more.

I'm aware I'm drivelling on, boring you with drooling (if heartfelt) sentiments, mostly because I'm avoiding saying good-bye to you even for a short time. I have to leave London tonight just for a few days. I'll be out of touch until I return, but I've left everyone and everything necessary in place to ensure your safety while I'm away. Leaving now will bring me home to you more quickly later.

You are my heart.

June 23 - 11:26

You are marrying Clara!? I go away for one week and this is what you do behind my back?! How could you do this to me?! Have you gone completely mad?! What the hell are you thinking? Clearly you are not thinking at all! I knew you were an idiot John, but I NEVER imagined you'd do something this stupid! For God's sake, why this!? Why, why?! You know I love you and I thought you…No! John, I know you love me. Dear God, please make this not true!

If I didn't know it would cause your death, I would come over to the flat right now and beat this idea out of you! I would break every bone in your body, twice, taking glorious pleasure in hearing the snapping and splitting of you limbs as I did it. Then I'd hold your broken body to my chest, cry with you, and swear to you that I will never leave you again. Please John, I'm begging you, don't do this! I'm dying here. You must know I can't live without you. You do know that, don't you?

You doubt me? You doubt my feelings?! That's fine then, fine! I don't care! I never did! Forget it! Forget all of it! Live a miserable life with this woman, if that's what you want! I will leave again this moment and I will never, ever come back! Damn you to hell, John!

June 24 - 6:10 am

I'm back. The shadows in my soul might have grown darker and longer last night, but as long as there's any light at all left for me to see my way back to you John, I will come. In fact, in the pitch blackness, expect me on bleeding hands and knees, crawling home to you, so I can beg for your forgiveness.

I've given my outburst some thought, a lot of thought. I conclude that perhaps I may have over-reacted a bit yesterday. I'm sorry, John. I can only assume that what I was experiencing was jealousy (if so, I don't like it).

I'm new at loving so please be patient with me. I'm sure I'll improve over time, really. And by-the-way, I'm well aware that you could kill me eleven different ways with just your little finger whenever the mood struck you, so your bones were never in any danger from me. And it goes without saying that there's no chance of you ever finding yourself in hell (unless you decide voluntarily to join me there)− I have no credibility what-so-ever with the deity responsible for placements in the after-life, so I calculate the risk to you of my curses to be nil.

Still, it was extremely rude of me to threaten you John, so once again, I am sorry. I will be careful not to do it again. You aren't stupid either. I think you are the wisest human that has ever lived, certainly a lot wiser than me. I do still quite desperately want to hold you to my chest and swear to never leave you again; I won't apologize for saying…er, shouting that. The crying is optional though, join me if you like.

My conclusion? It's best that you do whatever you feel you need to do John, to keep going while I'm not with you. I don't know why you are doing this and I intend to find out, but in the meantime, go ahead with my blessing. I will not interfere, for now. However, just a quick message for Clara; she shouldn't get used to having you around because you won't be with her for long. I do know what's best for you John, and it's me.

June 25 - 8:00 pm

I've done the research and it seems I made a complete ass of myself the day-before-yesterday. Again. What you are doing for Clara is good, John, very good and I am utterly humbled by the quality of your character. Again. If it were possible, I'd love you more than I do already. Since it isn't, just know that if I am ever, even one-quarter as good a man as you are; I'll consider myself a success.

Dear God, how I miss you.

10:16 pm

Are you still listening, John?

There is something else I want to tell you. My anger the other night? Jealousy yes, but it was grief too. John, it was supposed to be me. I have a ring for you. I've been keeping it, waiting for the moment when I felt you might accept it from me. I was never sure your answer would be yes and too afraid to ask otherwise. I regret that now. Now that I realize the offering is more important than the taking.

And I do want to offer you everything. Everything that I have, everything that I am, and all that you need. Forever.

For now, I will continue to wait. I will keep your ring on my finger where it will stay until I can place it onto yours and press both to my heart.

I love you, John. SH

((Anyone can continue as John or whoever they want))

Morton · November 20, 2013 6:22 pm

"Has he apologised?" Clara asked fetching John a cup of tea through to the living room.

John sat up straighter on the chair in Clara's flat and looked up from his laptop which he was reading Sherlock's e-mails to him from. "After threatening to break every bone in my body?" He took the mug of tea. "Thanks love. Yes, he's apologised in full. In the most comprehensive way known to humankind."

Clara looked at John and then the laptop expectantly and John passed it over to her. She sat and read, then reread her eyebrows shooting up in surprise. "My God, he's serious. How do we feel about that?"

"Um..." John struggled for words, the panoply of emotions fighting for supremacy on his face. "Um, guilty. Uncertain. Hopeful. Scared"

"Oh John, you shouldn't feel guilty. I mean, how long would it have gone on if you hadn't done something to make him think?"

She was right, John had to admit it, Sherlock blew hot and cold and he never knew if he was meant to go on dates or just stay 'Bachelor John Watson'. Sherlock would go off on bloody cases leaving him behind when, for all John knew, he needed him watching his back. And Sherlock had tried to fix him up with Clara. Clara! True he liked her but not 'that way'. She had come up with the plan to tell his best friend he was going to marry her and one of them would be proven right. Clara had been proven right, Sherlock did care in more than a platonic way. The e-mails were in front of him.

"Doesn't mean I don't feel guilty about it." John sipped his tea and thought about what to type and send back. At length he had an idea and placed his mug on the coffee table.

June 25th 10:47pm

Sherlock, you don't encourage me to care too much, pissing off on cases without me like this. And I can't, I won't, commit to anything unless my heart is truly in it, you know that. Christ, you know me better than I know myself sometimes.

I know you too, better than you know youself sometimes as well. But I've got questions. Ok? Are you going to stop going on cases without me? You confused the heck out of me when you weren't getting my attention by coming on that date with me with Sarah, and scotching it for me with Jeanette that Christmas, ok so I wasn't that into her but what the heck were you doing trying to fix me up with a date with Clara? If you love me why try to get rid of me?

Always an idiot for you,
John.

That seemed to say everything. He sent the mail with a jab on the 'send' key and reached for his tea again.

((I hope that's ok))

Cumbercookie · November 20, 2013 7:23 pm

Sherlock sighed. Mycroft had not stopped texting him, and it was getting annoying. Right now, Sherlock was crying. It wasn't something he did often, but today he was full-on sobbing his heart out. Email wouldn't be enough for him. He needed to hear John's voice: His soft, beutiful, gentle voice. He tried to control his sobbing but, finding that he couldn't, let the tears overcome him. He picked up his phone and dialled John's number. Then he pressed call and waited.

Morton · November 20, 2013 7:50 pm

There, he'd sent the e-mail and he closed the laptop. He felt as nervous as a kitten. What if Sherlock wanted a physical relationship, then what? It wasn't like he didn't fancy Sherlock, quite the opposite, with all his cheekbones and charm, damn it. Stop it, he told himself, cross that bridge when, if, necessary.

John nearly jumped out of his skin when his phone rang. God, he didn't need any powers of deduction to know it was Sherlock before he had even looked at the caller ID.

He cleared his throat before answering.

"Hello. You got my e-mail?" He asked. Of course Sherlock had got it. John licked his dry lips.

Cumbercookie · November 20, 2013 8:00 pm

Sherlock tried to speak, but his voice caught in his throat, causing him to sob harder. He tried to calm down. It was no use, so he just sobbed openly into the phone.

Morton · November 20, 2013 8:39 pm

John swallowed a hard lump in his throat hearing Sherlock pulling in short breaths and crying. He was now worried. Frightened, in fact. The only other time that he'd heard Sherlock get emotional like this had been when he went off Bart's roof. "Sherlock, tell me what's the matter, please, are you ill?"

Cumbercookie · November 20, 2013 8:43 pm

"No..." He managed, his breathing almost stopping altogether. He pulled his knees up onto his chair and whimpered softly.

Morton · November 20, 2013 8:52 pm

John willed Sherlock to answer instead of...sobbing. It wasn't much of a relief that Sherlock wasn't feeling ill. Jeezus, a horrible thought struck him and sent a chill right through his body. "Are you injured? Where are you?"

Cumbercookie · November 20, 2013 9:03 pm

"Home.." Sherlock whispered. He took several deep breaths. "This is all because of you, you know..." He said.

Morton · November 20, 2013 9:32 pm

John considered the information that came haltingly. "Home, ok." This Sherlock being upset was his fault. Everything was his fault, he was used to it. "I didn't know." He apologised, uncertain why he was apologising. "I've er been. I'll come home, shall I?" He didn't think Sherlock would want to be seen like he was, but he was asking to be sure.

Cumbercookie · November 20, 2013 10:11 pm

"Please do..." Sherlock sighed. "I love you..." He bit his lip and blushed when he said it, but still meant it.

Morton · November 22, 2013 8:11 am

It had all been a bit sudden. The trickle had become a dam burst of emotion from Sherlock. He couldn't criticise, call the kettle black when he was a black pot that bottled up what he felt. "I...I'll get a taxi." He wanted to say I love you too but he was worried that it would sound cliched, cheesey and he was better at showing what he felt than saying it. Any day. "I won't be long."

Cumbercookie · November 22, 2013 1:02 pm

"Okay. Please hurry up." Sherlock said, wincing at how babyish he sounded. John had definitaly changed him, he decided as he wiped his eyes and put the phone down.

Morton · November 24, 2013 1:08 pm

The phone call cut off. John pulled in a deep breth as he stared at his phone. "I'm going back to Baker Street. That was.."
"I did guess, John." Clara smiled. "Well go on, what're you waiting for." She slapped his arm harder than she intended.
"Ow." John objected stowing his phone and reaching for his jacket.

There was a passing cab and fifteen minutes later he'd paid the driver and was left on his doorstep fishing out his front door key. The key turned sweetly in the lock and John slipped indoors closing the door behind himself taking in a deep breath, preparing himself.

Cumbercookie · November 24, 2013 1:13 pm

Sherlock looked up from staring at the floor. "I missed you." He said. Then he stood up and pulled John into a hug.

Morton · November 24, 2013 6:59 pm

"I miss you when you go away." John admitted. He stood immobile unsure of where to put his hands in a hug with Sherlock. He settled for slipping an arm over Sherlock's, patting his friend's back. "What suddenly brought this on, you kept this well hidden."

Cumbercookie · November 24, 2013 7:03 pm

Sherlock shook his head. He held John tightly, as if he was terrified of losing him. "I don't know." He whispered.

Morton · November 26, 2013 9:14 pm

Sherlock knew practically everything of importance, at least to case work, but he always admitted when he didn't know something and John hadn't really expected an answer. "You're full of surprises." He grunted from a lack of breath at being held so tightly.

Cumbercookie · November 26, 2013 9:15 pm

Sherlock loosened his grip a little. "I am so sorry." He whispered.

((I'm sorry! I have edited it, so I hope you will continue))

Last edited by Cumbercookie (November 30, 2013 8:58 am)

Morton · November 26, 2013 11:42 pm

Sorry I shan't continue as I wrote to you in a PM to you I don't write slash on a publicly open forum. I enjoyed the rest though. Thank you.